Tomcat: An Old Identity That Should Be Brought Back

You know I support sapphic multisexuals who identify as femme. There is, after all, no reason it should be an identity exclusive to lesbians when it didn't even originate in lesbian culture (which bi women have, from the start, been a part of anyway) - it originated in Polari.

And I support all sapphic people in our right to reclaim the D slur, because it's used against all of us and it's incredibly arrogant and biphobic of lesbians to presume that they know bi women's experiences - including what slurs are and are not used against them - better than bi women themselves do. (And that "it's not a privilege to be called a slur!!!1!" bullshit strawman? Kindly shut up; you're embarrassing yourself. Non-lesbian sapphic women who reclaim the D slur don't hate you or want to co-opt lesbian struggles - they simply refuse to not reclaim a slur that's so frequently used against them simply because it makes biphobic lesbians uncomfortable to see them doing so.)

But I'm rethinking 'butch'.

First of all, I suspect that a lot of GNC sapphic multisexuals don't want to identify as butch because of internalized biases against butches and, therefore, a desire to disassociate from them.

Second, butch originated in working-class lesbian culture...which, again, included bi women because bisexual, at the time, was a slur because it was first used for MGA people as a pathological term and therefore identities 'lesbian', 'sapphic', 'invert', and 'homophile' were, until bisexuality was reclaimed in the sexual liberation movement, used for all sapphic women.

But at the same time...butch does hold heavy cultural significance for masculine lesbians, and it's not like it's the only word ever used to refer to masculine and androgynous LBPQ women. Stud and AG are perfectly acceptable substitutions for non-lesbians, as is another "new" (to me) word that was historically used for sapphic women: tomcat.

And yes, I'm pretty sure that's a sex joke.

It sounds kind of...awkward...to me, but it's also kind of weirdly awesome. I consider my gender expression androgynous, but ideally I'd be more masculine. And my sexual fluidity apparently makes me part of the MGA community.

In my opinion, if 'butch' is available only to lesbians, 'tomcat' should be available only to multisexuals. It's only fair. This means, of course, that if you aren't an MGA woman and/or woman aligned nonbinary person, and you identify as a tomcat, I will drag your bimisogynistic ass to hell right where it belongs.

That said, I'm undecided on whether or not tomcat identity should be available to non-sapphic multisexual women. I assume the term mostly referred historically to sapphic multisexuals, because of the 'cat' thing (I mean, come on...tomcat...what's another name for a cat...) and because a lot of the definitions I found said when I was researching this said tomcat is LGBT slang for "an aggressive woman" (which is generally code for 'she's sapphic'), but if the cat hypothesis is right, linking that identity to vaginas is cissexist and intersexist. Being sapphic has nothing to do with vaginas because not all women have vaginas and not everyone with a vagina is a woman.

Besides that, non-sapphic multisexual women are still multisexual and have as much place in bisexual/pansexual/sexually fluid/MGA culture as the rest of us. So, yes, as far as I'm concerned, they can identify as tomcats.

We can't forget sapphic women who identify as neither, who find neither bisexuality nor lesbianism relevant to their experiences or just aren't sure what they are. There are words for them, too.

There are, really, a lot of words used to refer to gender nonconforming sapphic women and that could be used for any of us. Stud. AG. Dapper. Dandy. Tomboy. GNC/gender nonconforming. Masculine or androgynous. Crossdresser. For black people specifically (because it's still a part of AAVE and nonblack people should respect that), boi.

Really, all of the terms I just listed, except for stud, AG, and boi, can be used by all women and woman-aligned people, even if they're straight. And stud and AG can both be used by masculine nonbinary people who aren't sapphic.

As for femme? Again, it's a Polari word. Not even from lesbian culture, per se, though that's where it's often used. In my opinion, femmes can be lesbians, gay men, bisexuals (of all genders, even if they're not attracted to their same gender), and any nonbinary and/or non-straight trans person who finds it applicable.

What that means is, bisexual femmes are here to stay, but now all sapphic women have a potential compromise that could help build solidarity in our communities and end a bitter battle that's gone way too far for way too long.